Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Ugly Betty

Do you ever have one of those days where you feel like you look like someone just threw up on you? That's how I feel today. I was on-call last night, so I had to choose today's clothes yesterday and I made a bad choice. The contrast between my white sweater and my brown pants is too stark and the textures don't flow. It's not cute and now I'm stuck. Poot.

Monday, February 19, 2007

I do not like green eggs and ham. I do not like them, Sam I Am!

They made me switch to the new blogger. I am not happy about it. I barely have time to post let alone time to learn about all of the new and exciting features. I resisted the effort for quite some time. This morning I thought I had fooled them, I clicked sign in using my old account, and I was redirected and forced to move.

I will continue to resist. You can make me move, but you can't make me be happy about it!

Thursday, February 08, 2007

mo money mo problems

It's Thursday night, but really it's Friday night for me because I don't have to go to work tomorrow. Well, I do, but someone else's work, not my work, so that's almost like Friday. Confused yet?

You know where I am on this Friday that isn't really Friday? No, I'm not watching The Office (because it really is Thursday)--I am taping it though, at least I'm praying it's taping, and yes, I'm serious about the praying part. It's The Office, there is no room for error. On this non Friday I am here at the hospital library. You know what this cool girl is doing in the library? Banking.

That's right, I'm attempting to balance my check book. My fiance thinks this is utter insanity because I do, in fact, have online banking through my bank. But, I still balance. I save all of my little receipts and then I go through and enter them into my check book. Sometimes I enter them as I charge them, sometimes I save them in a little pile. But, I always enter them.

Last time I was entering Freddie asked me if he could see my check book. "I'm not going to look at the balance", he said. [Good thing because although we are joining our lives in 4 and a half short months, I would not want him to have a clue how much money I don't have. (Truth be told, I was a little nervous he'd notice that Target appears three times in a row on more than one occasion!)] "I just want to see what you've got going here." As in, what is this archaeic ritual all about? He was amazed at my handiwork. It is quite impressive. I've been burning through the registers since I've gotten a real life grown up job and especially since I DO NOT EVER have cash on hand...so there is much to balance. But, lately things haven't actually been balancing. I suppose it could be worse because what's actually happening is I've been finding that I have MORE money than my bank thinks I have. (yes, this is actually a real problem.)

I think I've been adding things in when I spend them, then sometimes adding them again in the receipt pile. Although I do have a system that involves putting a little check on the receipts I've recorded and tucking them nicely in the back, sometimes errors do happen. Or, more often, I will cross reference this check register with the online banking and discover that I have...GASP...missed something. Only much later I realize that I didn't actually miss it, but I recorded the gas purchase as "Kangaroo" when they actually prefer to go by their gas brand name, or vice versa. It's all very confusing and so I charge myself twice. Or, I'll go ahead and deduct the money before I've gotten a chance to pay the bill online, and then I'll deduct it when I do. So, now I've got no clue how much money I actually have...because I don't trust the bank. And, I have every intention of teaching my children to do the same. (While this is a crazy thing usually associated with individuals who prefer the first national bank of Serta aka, stuff it in the mattress FDIC--I have actually witnessed a bank mistake involving someone else's debit card getting routed to my account and taking my money. It was all returned, but this is why I check.) I could wait a bit and see what the total says and hope that everyone has cashed checks I've written, or things have cleared. But, I'm always afraid I'll get tricked and end up in what with what I learned in 9th grade econ to fear with my life, A BOUNCED CHECK!!!!

So that's why I'm here. In the library. On fake Friday. Check book in one hand, calculator pulled up on the screen, paper in the other hand trying to compare and take notes. I printed off the screen from the online banking, but it was too wide, so only the first numbers appeared, so now I'm going through 11 pages of transactions and filling in the totals, so I can work on this at home, while I watch have a date with my boyfriend, Jim. Oh, and the bank has implemented this new security system for online banking that involves three screens before I can even get into my account. First I must enter my account number and the coded image. Then, I must answer the security question, then I must enter my password, but only if I see the secret word I provided printed underneath the box. It's crazy. And, if you take 25 seconds too long you have to start all over. AND, you have to sign in all over again if you don't do anything on the screen for more than 5 minutes, except there is nothing to do on the screen to let the computer know you're still there...just looking. ARGHHH! Maybe I'll reconsider this mattress idea.

Oh yeah, I would like to point out that fiance didn't find my checkbook balancing so appalling when he bounced a check buying sardines and saltines at a gas station in college. Back then I was a wise and responsible sage.

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Tuesday, February 06, 2007

every step you take, every move you make, I'll be watching you

I went home a few weekends ago to see Rent with my mom and my betrothed. It was fantabulous as always. The music moved and the story line shook me to my core, but the real excitement happened on Sunday-at the mall.

Deciding that it was time to actually wear the new shoes I got for Christmas, but needing to trade sizes first, we headed to Nordstrom at South Park for a little exchangaroo. South Park has gotten considerably high end since the days of the Christmas Carousel and the pet store, so we also decided to peruse a few other shops while Freddie sat idly buy watching a fountain.

As usual, I wandered off while we were in Anthropologie and my mom had to come looking for me. She seemed incredibly irritated, which surprised me because after 27 years you'd really think she'd be used to this by now, but also because, really mom, it's not that big of a store. When I called her name to show her this adorable tulip skirt, she kind of snipped at me. Afraid she'd cause a little scene, I decided to abandon my efforts on the skirt and went to her side.

Looking toward the door, she quickly and gruffly said, GIVEMEYOURSTUFFTHAT'SANDIEMACDOWELL!!! It took me a minute, but then I realized she was talking about her...

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Often distinguished by her curly mane, Mom also recognized her voice and her hunch was confirmed when the clerk said, Thanks, Andie!

So, I tossed my stuff to mom, and, of course, followed her out the door to confirm. She headed into a very fancy shoe store, which I could only pretend for about 5 minutes I could shop in, but it was in fact her.

This is not that unusual. Andie is actually spotted quite frequently in the area. I went to school with her niece. She has family in the area. But, it was our first Andie sighting, so we were excited.

When we returned to the check out, the girls were chatting..."She's not that nice." "No," the other girl said "she's not." The first girl replied, "she actually kind of scared me a little."

As we exited the store, we saw her rejoin her party, 3 teenagers, and spent about ten minutes following them around the mall. We watched from afar, which is what polite stalkers do. After leaving the shoe store, she stopped in Burberry. But, the best part was when she was chatting with her children in a central area outside of Neiman Marcus and a screaming girl came running toward her. You could see Andie's face flash with a look of annoyed desperation, "oh, the misery of fame. Can't I go out and spend a thousands of dollars without anyone bothering me for autographs?", but her look of desperation turned to shock, when the girl stopped abruptly 10 feet in front of her, she had just recognized her friend from across the mall and had to rave about the sale at Urban Outfitters! HA! Because the thing is, Andie actually seemed to walk through the mall virtually unnoticed. I wander if that actually upset her more than the previous scene. Perhaps we stalkers should have identified ourselves. It's rough being a forty something mom in the world where shoeless Britney and too tiny dogooder Angelina get all the credit. A woman needs to be fawned over every once in a while. If you're reading this, Andie, we realy did think you looked pretty good. I guess that L'Oreal stuff really works.
To The Left, To The Left

Fame really goes to some people's heads. I used to know this sweet, casual, fun guy who was proud of his work and always put a smile on my face. But, lately he just kind of seems like a skeez...and I mean that in the nicest sense of the word, because I can tell that, at heart, he's really the same guy. It's just that everytime I see him lately, he looks so slimy. He's trying to go for this slick look, when the fun casual thing really suited him. Come on, Mac, don't sell out. We loved you just the way you were.